Thursday, January 17, 2008

Have a Laugh

I seem to have had sex on the brain this week. Not, mind you in the way that would make my husband a happy camper. No, it's been more of the how much is too much and how much is not enough in my writing. I write for two different publishers, one erotic romance and one "spicy" romance, and I've always got to balance the two, and remember which one I'm writing for at any given time. I also belong to a fabulous critique group, where this week we had a huge discussion on if and then how we would critique "erotic" material, which of course brings up the question of what exactly constitutes erotic material.

The end result was for the most part, a headache. A really big whopping one of the hurts-to-hold-my-head-up-or-my-eyes-open variety. So to give everyone a break, I've decided to post some great quotes about sex. I got these off of one loop or another, so my profound thanks to whoever sent them.
  • There is nothing wrong with going to bed with someone of your own sex. People should be very free with sex, they should draw the line at goats. ~Elton John
  • There's nothing better than good sex. But bad sex? A peanut butter and jelly sandwich is better than bad sex. ~Billy Joel
  • Men wake up aroused in the morning. We can't help it. We just wake upand we want you. And the women are thinking, "How can he want me the wayI look in the morning?" It's because we can't see you. We have no blood anywhere near our optic nerve. ~Andy Rooney
  • Why should we take advice on sex from the pope? If he knows anything about it, he shouldn't! ~George Bernard Shaw
  • He no play-a-da-game. He no make-a-da rules! ~Earl Butz, referring to thePope's stricture against contraception
  • For women the best aphrodisiacs are words. The G-spot is in the ears. He who looks for it below there is wasting his time. ~Isabel Allende
  • Sex without love is an empty experience, but as empty experiences go it's one of the best. ~Woody Allen
  • Sex at age ninety is like trying to shoot pool with a rope. ~George Burns
  • Conservatives say teaching sex education in the public schools willpromote promiscuity. With our education system? If we promote promiscuity the same way we promote math or science, they've got nothingto worry about. ~Beverly Mickins
  • It is not economical to go to bed early to save the candles if the result is twins. ~Chinese Proverb
  • The only thing wrong with being an atheist is that there's nobody to talkto during an orgasm. ~Author Unknown
  • Were kisses all the joys in bed, One woman would another wed.~William Shakespeare, Sonnets to Sundry Notes of Music, IV
  • The reproduction of mankind is a great marvel and mystery. Had Godconsulted me in the matter, I should have advised him to continue the generation of the species by fashioning them out of clay. ~Martin Luther
  • Tell him I've been too fucking busy - or vice versa. ~Dorothy Parker
  • The difference between pornography and erotica is lighting. ~Gloria Leonard
  • There are a number of mechanical devices which increase sexual arousal, particularly in women. Chief among these is the Mercedes-Benz 380SLconvertible. ~P.J. O'Rourke

7 comments:

Bronwyn's Blog said...

Great blog, Cindy - some of those made me laugh out loud!

Mel said...

I just loved those. Great post.

suzanne said...

These are great Cindy!

Lacey Thorn said...

I absolutely love this Cindy! What a fantastic blog! Love the quotes!

Lacey

Mona Risk said...

* The G-spot is in the ears. He who looks for it below there is wasting his time. ~Isabel Allende

They are all great but this one is my favorite.

JacquƩline_Roth said...

I loved these. Very funny!

Jane Richardson, writer said...

Oh, Cindy, thanks for these! Priceless. You can always rely on old 'Author Unknown' to get it right!

Jane x