Tuesday, July 14, 2009

To Be or Not to Be HEA

Nowadays you can get a happily ever after (HEA) or a happy for now (HFN) ending. Personally as a writer and reader I prefer a happily ever after or HEA.
Growing up I dreamed about being Cinderella and Snow White. I didn’t want seven dwarfs, but hey seven men looking after my every need – not too shabby. Seriously though, I dreamed about growing up and finding my ONE knight in shining armor.
Let me tell you something about fairy tales, their exactly that. During high school I dated someone for three years who was emotionally abusive. After getting out of the relationship I eventually met my first husband. He swept me off my feet. Wooed me until he had me, and then surprised me one day when he hit me. It didn’t stop there. I stayed in that marriage for almost fifteen years.
During my first marriage I wrote to escape the reality of my life. I created heroines who I wanted to be, with a HEA ending. My heroines endured many difficult situations, but always came out victorious. And if they could get away with murder…well, that’s another book.
I also read. Reading was my other escape from reality. Books took me away to exotic places. Places I could only dream about.
Three years after my marriage ended I met someone who seemed too good to be true. Believe me; I had all kinds of walls surrounding me. I wasn’t going to be abused by another man in my life. Turned out he wasn’t too good to be true. He was and still is, my knight in shining armor.
Six years later we’re still happy as when we first started dating.
Writing HEA’s is easier today than it was back then, because now I’m living them. Not just wishing for them.
I don’t want my heroine to be happy for now. I want her to be happy forever. I want her to bask in the glow of that one and only true love. It IS fiction after all.

13 comments:

Fran Lee said...

Oh, Amber...glad you found your HEA with that knight in shining armor. Great post!

Cindy Spencer Pape said...

Hugs, Amber. SO glad you found your own HEA. Though my situation is very different, I totally agree. Even when I've written an HFN, (due to publisher requirements) in my mind, the HEA happened on the next page.

Anonymous said...

HEA is the 'prize' at the end of romantic fiction! I agree with Cindy - I always finish the HFN endings in my head!
Tessie Bradford

Regina Carlysle said...

Many many people need the escape YOU did, whether in reading or writing stories where happiness is real and tangible and offers hope. Glad you found your prince, Ms. Cinderella. Who wants HFN when they can have HEA?

julia barrett said...

I pretty much like an HEA. HFN will do if that's all there is, but an HEA is my first choice - I think it's because there are so few HEAs in the world that at least when I read a romance, I like my two main characters to get one.

Cerise DeLand said...

Amber, Courageous of you to come and discuss this. An HEA of your own is so encouraging to those who may find themselves in a situation like yours was. But they may also take heart from you--and build a new path to their own HEA.
Bravo to you, my dear.
Cerise

Kelley Heckart said...

I think most romance readers want the HEA ending, but I'm okay with a HFN ending. It depends on the story.

kelleyheckart.com

jean hart stewart said...

Amber, so glad you found the right guy. And I think HEA is a must...HFN just doesn't do it for me.

Katalina said...

In real life I want a HEA but I remember a few HFN adventures in the past that were wonderful. I wouldn't trade them for anything and they made more appreciative of a HEA when it finally came along.
Katalina Leon

Unknown said...

Thanks everyone for stopping by and sharing your kind words. It's nice to see everyone's thoughts on HEA!

Marianne Stephens said...

Amber, I'm so glad you found your HEA with the right man! Good for you and keep writing what you're living...real HEA's!

Mia Watts said...

Love this post. Came here to repost. Excellent blog and plot-twisting personal development. You've made it through. Well done.

Paris said...

Amber,thank you for your courageous post and your insight into the HEA. I'm glad you found yours.